i've just realized..

....that you are always more awesome in your mind that you actually are. i mean this in a complete normal way, not like a 'whoa is me' sort of way. I'd like to consider myself a dreamer of sorts. of one that looks life in the eye and says 'no way life, im gonna do it my own way' but i dont.

so like i said, i think im pretty awesome, but im really just ordinary. nothing wrong with being ordinary. i wish i had a nice camera. one that would take awesome pictures. ive always loooved taking pictures, and im actually quite good at it (at least in my head i am). but ive never gotten a decent camera. all the cameras ive owned are ones that i can shove in a tampon box to sneak into concerts without getting caught. haha. life makes me smile.

if and when i get a job with my first big kid paycheck im gonna buy a camera. deal.

i want a polaroid camera. that. would. rock.

i also decided to grow out my hair. all awesome photographer people have long, untamed hair. its almost like their hair is saying 'no way, im not going to be bound by a hair tie, i will do what i want'. so natural. so organic. so artistic. i love it.

tomorrow i am making my mommy play photographer and take some pictures of me to use for my graduation announcements. i feel like a big kid. graduating will be awesome.

i love blog posting. it makes me feel trendy. so while im sitting in my apartment with the sounds of call of duty playing in the background and im staring at my computer it just makes me feel better. just me. and the keys. its almost peaceful in a way.

i think thats all for now. i will be posting some pictures soon. i dont have any worth posting at the moment.