"Be patient in afflictions, for thou shalt have many; but endure them, for, lo, I am with thee, even unto the end of thy days." -D&C24-8
I've recently come across this scripture and I may in fact write it on my forehead just to remind me of it daily. Today is a sad day. Just feeling a little down. Feeling a little bummed out and broken hearted. I'm getting to the point where seeing babies and little ones make my heart ache. It's awful.
We had family dinner tonight complete with most of our family.
I hate being one of the two couples without kids.
I feel inadequate.
I feel like we're left out of the family. (even though were totally not.)
It's like back when you were single and all your friends had boyfriends. And you just felt like you were broken some how. That nobody wanted you or included you.
Yeah. It's like that. Except now I have the guy and the one thing we want most in life- we can't have.
And I hate it.
My family and my nieces and nephews mean the world to me.
Seeing how happy they all are just makes me want what I can't have even more.
I really hope that one day soon I can join in and we can grow from a family of two to a family of three.
I'm sorry you're feeling down right now. I understand feeling a little out of the loop with everyone else having kids. I know it will happen for you though Ashlee - you have such a great attitude and I can just tell you are going to be an awesome mom.
ReplyDeleteThat is the perfect scripture for right now. Keep on keepin' on!
M
I feel like you are in my head with this post. I totally understand your comparison of being single in a world full of married people. Forgotten, left behind, on the sidelines watching as everyone else moves on with the things you most desire but can't have. I had hoped that since I had struggled so long to get married that adding to our family wouldn't be a struggle too.
ReplyDeleteI like the scripture that you posted but in all honesty we're having trouble these days feeling like He is here with us.